Show Me The Meaning of Being Lonely
by A-Lady
Summary: Blaise Zabini had a perfect life. Then one day, the London Riots turned his world pitch black. Voldemort, it seemed, was still affecting the world through the grave. First in a series of song fics about the War.


"May God watch over her soul." The Minister said, sparks flying out of the tip of his wand over the mahogany box. The people in black slowly turned and walked away, women clinging to their husbands for support; men gritting their teeth to suppress their own tears.

Only one person was left standing by the coffin a few minutes later. He knelt in the snow by the box and whispered

"Only the best for you Mary." Blaise's vision clouded with tears, vibrant red was the color of everything. "I'll only ever love you." He stood in his black cloak let back his head, and let out the most heart-breaking cry. "WHYYYYYYYYY? WHYYYYYYYYYYYY?" Blaise's screams were suddenly cut short and he was back in the snow taking in shaky breaths every minute or so.

Another man, with bright blonde hair came walking over and put a hand on Blaise's shoulder. "Come on. Let's go." Blaise slowly stood and pulled the cap down farther on his head and walked with Draco to where the carriages were waiting.

Blaise drank another shot the Arborril (the strongest legal wizard liquor). He remembered bitterly how Mary died. He felt like it was his fault.

_Blaise and Mary were walking through Downtown London. Their brand-new marriage was shining bright through the Dark Times. Voldemort was gone, but Dark Times continued as Banks all over the World, Wizarding or otherwise, crashed. Mary was four months pregnant with their first child and their future was looking bright. He had a job and a nice home with a beautiful wife. It seemed that the darkness couldn't touch them. Then the raids began, right before their eyes. _

_A man came running out of a building with a torch of gathered sticks. He threw it into the shop in front of the couple. Mary quickly charmed her mother's necklace invisible. As more people pooled into the street Blaise put an arm around her and walked briskly, looking for a place to apperate from. _

_Someone fired a gun into the air and Blaise apperated the two of them right then and there. Another gun shot. "Blaise. St. Mungo's." Mary said weakly once the spinning had stopped. She'd caught a bullet in the back as they'd begun to apperate. He quickly apperated her to the hospital. She died before a Healer even got to her. His sun disappeared, the world went dim. His child and his wife were gone. _

He felt the hand of a friend on his shoulder. "Blaise, you need to stop drinking. It can't be good for you. I know your lonely, but"

"Lonely" Blaise spat bitterly. "What does it even mean? How would you know Draco?"

"I'm just asking you to stop. For those of us who care about you…you changed when Mary died. We all miss her, she was almost my sister, but you've got to let it go! It's been a year!"

"Whatever."

"Look, what do you need me to do? Pansy and I are trying to help but"

"You know what I want Draco. I want to be with her and you know what that takes."

"I won't kill you."

"Why not?"

"Because…because, I'm not doing it!"

"Draco" Blaise sighed. He put down the glass. "You don't get it. I'm empty inside! Do I really need to walk around with this? I haven't felt joy since Mary. Not an ounce."

All around Blaise, life went on. Draco and Pansy had a son whom they named Scorpius. He was asked to be the godfather. For Scorpius' sake, he pretended to be cheerful. But his eyes merely saw, never observed. For Blaise, life didn't go one. He was stuck in the pain and agony. It only became worse as he watched his best friend live the life he was supposed to have. It was 2001, three years after Mary. He didn't remember how to smile.

He'd bought a car and was driving, listening to muggle radio. An old song came on. He and Mary were still engaged when the song first came out.

_Show me the meaning of being lonely  
So many words for the broken heart  
It's hard to see in a crimson love  
So hard to breathe  
Walk with me, and maybe  
Nights of light so soon become  
Wild and free I could feel the sun  
Your every wish will be done  
They tell me_

Show me the meaning of being lonely  
Is this the feeling I need to walk with  
Tell me why I can't be there where you are  
There's something missing in my heart

Life goes on as it never ends  
Eyes of stone observe the trends  
They never say forever gaze upon me  
Guilty roads to an endless love (endless love)  
There's no control  
Are you with me now?  
Your every wish will be done  
They tell me

There's nowhere to run  
I have no place to go  
Surrender my heart, body, and soul  
How can it be  
You're asking me  
To feel the things you never show

You are missing in my heart  
Tell me why I can't be there where you are

For the first time in two years, Blaise cried. The car lost control as he gave it up. He smiled as the car plunged into the ice water.

* * *

This is the link for the song. Oh, and I own nothing. Song belongs to the Backstreet Boys. even if u don't like them, watch the vid. It'll help u understand the story.

/watch?vPaZWQHzfGXs


End file.
